As a parent you help your child grow in more ways than anyone can possibly list. One of the ways that you help them grow is by helping them to learn and develop good behavior. This can be difficult but it can also be rewarding. Let’s take a look at the different ways you can manage your child’s behavior.
Lead Through Example
Your child looks to you as someone to learn from. Whether you realize it or not, they are watching you at all times. If they see you do something, chances are they will want to do it too. By behaving well yourself, you are teaching your child to do so too.
Let your child see you calm yourself and exhibit good behaviors. Sometimes you can point this behavior out to them, but it also helps them to learn if they see you do it naturally.
Involve them in your own behavior management. For example, if you need to calm down, have them calm down with you.
Don’t Pay Attention To Bad Behavior
The more attention that you show to behavior, the more it will be repeated. You may be tempted to put a lot of attention when your child acts out but this will only show them that it is a way to get said attention. If your child isn’t harming anyone, don’t show attention to negative behavior. At the same time, make sure you are showing plenty of attention to positive behavior.
Don’t forget to acknowledge good behavior. Try congratulating them on listening or thank them for using their indoor voices.
Practice Attention Moderation
It is hard to get into the habit of moderating the attention that you show your child to control their behavior. But the more you practice showing them positive attention when they are acting appropriately, and the less you focus on negative attention, the more they will start to learn.
Fill Up The Attention Meter
The amount of attention your children need every day can be thought of as a meter. If you fill that meter with positive attention, they won’t have the inclination to act out in negative ways. Positive attention does not mean that you have to just acknowledge good behavior. Try things like:
- Pats on the back
- Regular play time
- Talking with your children
- Give loving touches as you pass by
There is no limit to how much positive attention you can give your child in one day. That being said, it is important that you provide a mix of attention. This helps to spread out the positivity in their day.
Another important thing to keep in mind is that even a little bit of positivity can go far. A simple pat on the back when you see them behaving or watch them accomplish something can mean the world. Spending five minutes walking and talking can mean the world. Small actions add up over time.
Each one of these steps will help you to change your child’s behavior. While you might need punishment occasionally, each step is designed to help your child learn what behaviors are appropriate and what are not without the need for regular punishment. The most important part of this is working with your children to learn the behaviors they need to exhibit.